#this is digustingly cute

[entomolog-t]

Valentine's Day Special- Conversation Hearts

Happy Valentine's Day! As a treat here's a not-currently-canon-but-maybe-future-canon short for INSTAЯ as a part of the G/t Valentine's Prompt List.

Bram find's a new way to get his messages across.

Word count: 759

(Bonus there is some that will accompany this short- I'd just like to get a little farther on GtWAC and my comissions before taking the time to finish)

____

“I know you washed your hands but there is something deeply wrong about that.��� 

Bram pulls back his hand from the batter with a glare, chirping incomprehensible words, yet the cadence made it clear he was mocking me by mimicking my chiding. Below us, Honey whines, desperate for her share of Bram’s stolen batter.

I return his glare, though I can't help but chuckle at his disdain as I shoo him away from the bowl. His eyes narrow as he chitters some sort of grievance at me, Honey’s pleas going unanswered as he makes quick work of the batter coating his claws.

The sight sends a chill down my spine. 

Was that a tongue? I shudder, not wanting to think too long about the logistics of how his nightmarish mouth worked. I turn my focus away from what I'd come to recognize as his muttering and back to the task at hand, whisking in the pistachio cream and cardamom extract, the batter taking on an almost cozy scent. One by one, I fill the cupcake papers, a grin tugging at the corners of my lips at the thought of how nice the house would smell as they baked. The soft music playing nearly hid the sounds of his talons as they clicked across the countertop- thankfully, away from the batter.

It felt … good. 

Normal even. Just to be able to ease into something familiar again, if only for a moment. 

For just that singular moment, I could get lost in a fantasy where there wasn’t a tiny abomination trying to sneak a taste at the cupcake batter… A fantasy where Bram was… Bram and we were just a normal pair of people spending time together. 

My relief didn’t last long, as the unmistakable sound of a plastic bag rustling broke through the cozy ambience. 

I frown. 

He’d, quite literally, gotten into the Conversation Hearts Clyde had dropped off that I’d been planning on using as toppers for the cupcakes.

“You overgrown cockroach,” I scold, though the smile that tugs at the corners of my lips dulls any edge the insult carries, “You act like I don’t feed you.” 

The bag chirps with what I can only assume is some snide retort thrown my way. I sigh, smile still tugging at my lips as I move the tray to the oven. Had he always had such a sweet tooth, or was this something to do with - 

A sort of whistling chirp abruptly pulls me away from my thoughts. I turn my attention to Bram- a conversation heart in his main set of arms. As I’m about to make a comment about his digustingly sweet choice of snack, he holds the heart out towards me and I feel my own freeze in my chest. 

Oh.

I stare at him for a moment. What could have only been a second seeming to stretch far longer than reality should permit. 

There was a dreadful feeling of both being caught off guard and knowing exactly where this was going- my brain rattling off various little sayings printed on those hearts. 

Be mine

You’re cute

Love you

I felt heat rise to my face. 

Kiss me

I swallow. I could only hope that my face didn’t show a fraction of the panic running full tilt through my mind. I mean, of course we’d grown to like each other's company- it’s not like there were any other options out here. All that time together… we’d grown closer but- How was I supposed to respond to this? If anything the majority of our time spent together was spent annoying one another- sure it had been teasing… but certainly not that kind of teasing! I chew on my lip, a strange feeling of dread brewing in my chest- would I break his heart?

Though another question seemed to itch the at the back of my mind, 

Did I have to?

My heart thrums loudly in my ears, each beat feeling all too much like gunfire. I reach my hand out towards him, and he hands me the candy heart, his tail swishing behind him in anticipation. 

I grit my teeth, mind reeling over just what I was supposed to say.

He chitters, and my brow knits together as I recognize the noise. Not nerves... The broken half chirps had become a familiar sound- laughter. As I read the tiny red text, the weight vanishes from my shoulders, a feeling of genuine relief accompanying the all too familiar sting of irritation. Irritation for both Bram and Clyde. 

YOU SUCK

[clemswinecorner-socials]

Sponsor - Paul's posts

See Y/N's posts, Ralf's posts up soon

Paularon_

liked by aronralf, prema_racing and others

paularon_ business partners! so happy about this collaboration with fhih and @/yourusername. for the past few months you’ve been a great friend and you’re so good at what you do. i'm so lucky to have both a best friend and an incredible business partner in one person! thank you for believing in me <;3 tagged yourusername

posted february 6th, 2023

yourusername brb crying yourusername thank you so much paul <3 aronralf welcome to the family y/n randomfan this is so sweeeet prema_racing let's go😎 noccoeesti 💪🏼💪🏼💪🏼 premafan y/n’s aesthetic🤌🏼🤌🏼🤌🏼

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Paularon_

Bahrain

liked by frederikvestiofficial, olliebearman and others

paularon_ first race of the season✅

posted march 4th, 2023

paulsfan let's go babyyyyy mercedesamgf1 on to the next💪🏼💪🏼 premafannn ❤️❤️❤️ yourusername well done champ! zak.osullivan nice sunglasses mate paularonfan it was good to see you race again! and more to come tomorrow :))

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Paularon_

Monaco

liked by yourusername, aronralf and others

paularon_ trackwalk thursday

posted may 25th, 2023

dinobeganovic_ trackwalk thursday without me 🙄

paularon_ not my fault you were late 🙄

fanofarons ralf and y/n bonding as paul takes insta picture

yourusername we were genuienly trying to discuss something for the next race but paul didnt let us 😭

yourusername cant wait for the raceeee premafan i will always be obsessed with pauls instagram

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Paularon_

liked by premaracing_, olliebearman and others

paularon_ winner winner yn gets us dinneeeeeeer tagged fiaf3, prema_racing, mercedesamgf1, yourusername

posted june 4th, 2023

yourusername i love spending money because you won pls win more often🥰 ynstan y/n implying she will get them dinner every race win is so rich ceo of her as she should frederikvestiofficial good job today 🙏🏼 paulfans let's get it!!!! so proud of you🖤💙 aronralf let's go olliebearman can you buy me dinner too when i win? @/yourusername

yourusername yes omg

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Paularon_

Barcelona, Spain

liked by zak.osullivan, dennis_hauger and others

paularon_ vacation with the aron's tagged aronralf, annaaron_, yourusername

posted july 26th, 2023

paulsfan aww the aron parents cute🥹🥹 ralfandpaullover yn coming on the family vacation racingfan hope you're enjoying the time off yourusername this is a big slay yourusername my fav arons in one post!! (mrs aron and anna)😍😍 zak.osullivan have fun mate!

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Paularon_

liked by frederikvestiofficial, annaaron_ and others

paularon_ he might get the kisses but i get all the money (since you're publicly together now here's some digustingly cute pictures i took) tagged yourusername, aronralf

posted august 10th, 2023

yourusername stop paul these are lovely🥲🥲 juanmanuelcorrea_ theyre so gross

yourusername dont lie you love having us as parents

paulsfan OHMYGOD??? THIS IS SO CUTE yoursibling youre so right for taking her money ynlover these pictures omg racingfan yn being pauls sponsor, bestie and now in law is just so funny aronralf 💜💜

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[thebardisabird]

The matsus go to Las Vegas

This is Osomatsu’s dream playground. He’s been playing pachinko since forever, and he hears old wives tales of Las Vegas - but to be here and seeing it? He’s ready to go fucking nuts. Literally “fuck it, we ball” as he prepares to blow every last bit of yen he had. Has a blast the entire time he does too though he ends up digustingly broke at the end.

Karamatsu is on the strip with the rest of the interestingly dressed people. Does not understand why they are dressed up that way, but is excited to see that he doesn’t have to be the only one in glitter and sequins anymore! Ends up in the limo of a very wealthy suitor who gives him a stack of cash and calls him incredibly handsome, but doesn’t realize what kind of company he’s keeping until it’s almost too late. Ends up leaving the cash behind and screams his way back to the hotel where he stays the rest of the day.

Choromatsu actually ends up at an cabaret show! He’s heard about cabaret in the past, but in his minds eye he’s thinking that it’s similar to an idol show just a little more flashy and costume-y. He’s kind of right for some part of it; he enjoys the very stunning costumes and dancing - but he completely had forgotten about how sensual some of the shows can be. Poor man ends up passed out on the floor once the dancer on stage removes her bustier and starts shaking her tassles.

Ichimatsu can be found behind the bar at the largest casino in town, making drinks. None of the staff is clear on how he got there or who he even is - but he’s got great customer service and can make a perfect martini so they decide not to question it. He ends up going back home with an unspeakable amount of tips.

Jyushimatsu has somehow ended up in a slot machine. Yes, IN the machine. His face will even pop up on the actual slot screen! Only way to get him out is to successfully get 5 Jyushi’s across - which might take a while.

Todomatsu is doing the tourist thing! He sees the sights, eats delicious food, goes to so many attractions & even gets pictures with cute dancers and girls visiting Vegas just like him…all for his phone to be completely obliterated by his brothers for even thinking he was allowed to take pictures with cuties and get away with it.

All of them end up very exhausted by the end of their trip and they almost miss their flight. Osomatsu has to tied to a pole and dragged back to the airport because he literally refuses to leave and wants to sell his kidney to continue playing at the casino.

[wonderfulworldofmichaelford]

Michael in the Mainstream: Top 100 Movies #50 - #26

Finally, we're in the top 50! These next movies are ones I have a little bit more to say about than the previous entries, though the real big fish to fry will be in the final stretch.

50. Cats

Bad movies like this don’t come around very often. Nearly every aspect of this movie is hilariously misguided to the point of insanity, with the special effects in particular turning what should be a campy romp into a bizarre fever dream. But this is precisely what draws me to the film! The flashes of greatness in the back half of the movie, particularly the genuinely great Skimbleshanks scene, really come together to create one of the most endearingly batshit experiences you could ever sit through.

49. Scott Pilgrim vs. the World

A movie that ruined an entire generation of women or something, this is a just a perfectly stylish action comedy with one of the most absurdly talented casts around. It's a fun, silly little live action comic book romp that manages to make great use of Michael Cera.

48. Eraserhead

Now this is the David Lynch we all know and love! This is one of the trippiest, weirdest movies ever made, and it has one of the greatest effects ever in the baby. I fucking love that baby. It is one of the most digustingly cute creatures ever conceived.

47. Hot Fuzz

Edgar Wright’s Shaun of the Dead is the far more popular of his genre parodies, but if I’m being totally honest Hot Fuzz is by far the superior film. It’s just funnier, fresher, and more exciting. It also has actual antagonists and some really great and memorable lines, plus it loves Point Break and, of all movies, Bad Boys II.

46. Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl

Somehow, by some miracle, Disney managed to make a theme park ride featuring pirates (legendary box office poison) and make it into the most fun, exhilarating action adventure films of the 2000s. I think the bonkers premise combined with playful conviction from the entire cast is what really manages to sell this movie, but I must sadly give credit where credit is due: pre-dickhead era Johnny Depp, back when he was actually a good actor and not someone cast out of pity, brought the swaggering rock star pirate Jack Sparrow to life in glorious fashion, and manages to steal every scene he’s in. The only thing that could possibly make it better is if greatest character in the whole franchise Davy Jones was in this one, but they had to save something for the sequel.

45. It

While the miniseries starring Tim Curry as Pennywise has its charm, it is hampered by the restraints of television and its budget. With more money, we got a bigger, bloodier, gorier, and more impressive take on the iconic King novel, one that might be my favorite movie based on one of his works. The new, more horrifying and predatory take on Pennywise is certainly a big plus, but I think credit also has to be given to a young Sophia Lillis showcasing her acting chops early and Finn Wolfhard before he stopped giving a shit, as well as the rest of the kid cast. The Loser Club is the heart and soul of the story, and thankfully it’s the thing this movie nails… and it’s sadly where part two drops the ball a little bit. Grown ass adults in a secret club fighting an evil clown isn’t as cool as kids doing it, no matter how great it is to see James McAvoy and Bill Hader.

44. Kill Bill: Vol. 1

Speaking of movies where the sequel just couldn’t measure up…! This is one of Tarantino’s finest works, and certainly the one that most feels like the kind of movies that inspire him. There’s blood, ore, women going on a vengeful rampage… It really is a classic grindhouse movie with more polish. Uma Thurman truly kills it (along with scores of mooks) as Beatrix Ki—Er, I mean “The Bride.”

43. Predator

One of the manliest action films ever made, and also one of the greatest halfway plot switches of all time. You think you’re getting a simple macho 80s action film, and then halfway through, BAM! It’s a slasher movie and the macho men are the prey for a terrifying killer. Our final girl Arnold Schwarzenegger only wins by embracing those macho tropes and adapting them to a new foe. I think it’s a film where you can read it on the most surface level imaginable and deeply analyze it and still come to the exact same conclusion either way: This movie fucking rules.

42. The Batman

Live action Batman movies have been good, but too many of them miss core aspects of what makes Batman, well, Batman. Even the best ones like The Dark Knight, Batman Returns, or even Batman & Robin miss a few aspects and, while great films in their own right, just don’t feel like the definitive Batman. Then one half of the dudes behind Felicity took a crack at it and boy does he get it. This is what Batman should be. There’s detective work, there’s action, there’s car chases and gadgets, and most fascinatingly it’s an origin story but not in the way you think; rather than him becoming Batman, it’s him learning to become a symbol of hope instead of a symbol of fear. Robert Patinson proves he is one of the greatest talents of his age, and Paul Dano brings a deranged campiness to his Riddler that helps keep things comic booky even in a realm of grounded realness. And then there’s Colin Farrell’s Penguin, who is so good he got his own spin off show. It has never been a better time for Batman fans when it comes to cinema; we are eating good.

41. Guardians of the Galaxy

I was a bit skeptical at this film when I sat down to watch it. I mean, these were heroes I’d never heard of headlining a Marvel film when they seemed to be hitting their stride. Then the film opened with a crushing emotional moment, and then it goes into the opening credits as Chris Pratt dances like a goober to “Come and Get Your Love.” It all clicked for me, and it only got better from there as it morphed into the greatest “group of assholes become a found family” I ever saw at the time. I do think it’s the weakest of the trilogy now; Ronan is not a compelling villain and aside from that Redbone tune that opens the movie, the soundtrack kind of sucks (“Cherry Bomb?” Fucking seriously?). But when it comes to the Guardians, “weakest” is still “one of the best goddamn sci-fi action films you’ll ever watch.” It’s nice getting a reminder Chris Pratt is actually a good actor at any rate.

40. Raiders of the Lost Ark

I think even I can concede that The Last Crusade is objectively the best Indy film. I mean, it has Sean Connery in it, after all. But sometimes you just gotta let your nostalgia take the wheel, and when it does it tells me this one deserves the higher spot. No mattter what Sheldon Cooper says, this is one of the best and most thrilling pulp action movies ever made, and one of Spielberg’s finest blockbusters. If nothing else, it definitely has the best opening and arguably the best climax of the whole series. And maybe this is a hot take unless you’re Harrison Ford himself, but Indy > Han Solo.

39. Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse

It’s honestly amazing how this movie got me to give a shit about so many characters I wouldn’t ever have really thought about much otherwise. Miles Morales went from a cool footnote to one of my favorite Spider-Men, Gwen Stacy went from the dead love interest to a cool and alive love interest, Kingpin went from the best mob boss villain in comic books to the best mob boss villain in comic book movies… and that’s not even getting into how creatively this film uses the multiverse and the concept of variants. It’s really no big surprise just about every superhero movie in the coming years tried to crib its style.

38. The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King

This movie is ass-numbingly long, especially if you’re watching the extended version (and I always do—weird bits that kind of rob suspense aside the death of Sauruman, the Mouth of Sauron, and Harvey Weinstein orc getting killed are too good to pass up) and it has about a dozen endings, but you can’t really say any of it is unearned considering what came before it. This is truly an amazing capstone to the most epic fantasy trilogy ever made, and not once in that monstrous runtime does it ever feel like any time is wasted.

37. The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly

This is the Western, and easily Clint Eastwood’s greatest performance ever. But despite how unflinchingly cool and badass he is, and despite how terrifying Lee Van Cleef is as the villain, it is Eli Wallach as the titular “ugly,” an all-too human lout, who manages to be the most fascinating character in the story. The final showdown is one of the greatest in all of cinema, and the Ennio Morricone score is iconic. If you only ever watch one Western in your life, make it this one.

36. The Prestige

Christopher Nolan may not know how to write women, but he sure knows how to take a batshit premise and deliver on it. This film about dueling magicians takes at least a half dozen turns, each crazier than the last, and makes rewatches oh so rewarding. Plus, David Bowie plays Tesla. That’s fucking rad.

35. Oldboy

When a film starts off with a man eating a live octopus onscreen, you know you’re in for something special. This might be one of the greatest “revenge really fucking sucks” stories ever made and one of the greatest downer endings of all time. The twist is genuinely a curveball of epic proportions, and the villain is one of the most heinous yet sympathetic you could ever hope to see. It’s a damn good movie that definitely should never be remade with Marvel actors.

34. Fight Club

I get you’re not supposed to talk about this one, but it’s hard not to considering how liking this movie can easily be misconstrued as being an endorsement of cult-like anarchism and chud ideologies. I like this movie because of its critiques of capitalism as well as its examination of the kind of guy Tyler Durden is, and also because this movie is super fucking gay. It also has Jared Leto getting his face caved in by Ed Norton. Literally every aspect of this movie is ridiculously appealing.

33. The Room

I fucking love bad movies, and this? This is the Citizen Kane of bad movies. Tommy Wiseau’s magnum opus is the sort of bad movie that comes along only once in a generation, something so spectacularly bad it must be seen to be believed. Hell, the reason I love Cats so much is it somehow manages to capture the absurd insanity of this film with a bigger budget, but this one is still better because rather than being an adaptation it is the singular vision of an egotistical blowhard who thought he was making great art. And you know what? He was right. This is the pinnacle of “so bad, it’s good.”

32. Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse

And you thought I was insane for preferring Glass Onion over Knives Out! Well, look here! I like the sequel so many “genius” animation critics derided as “incomplete” or “half a story.” I’m not the brightest guy on the planet, but even I understand the concept of cliffhangers and dark endings that set up future storylines; it’s like these people have never seen The Empire Strikes Back, which this is very much in the vein of. I think for me while the original film has a better and more focused story and a more interesting villain with Kingpin, the scope and the more impressive work done with the animation elevate this one above the first film in my mind.

31. Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves

A Guardians of the Galaxy clone based on a TTRPG that has famously had bad luck with adaptations and starring a cast of absurdly famous people you wouldn’t expect to give a damn about telling a compelling story in this setting… Truly, this was a disaster waiting to happen. But that’s just it: It didn’t happen. This is the best fantasy film we’ve gotten in ages, and a movie that is faithful to the concept of D&D. What I mean is that while it’s not literally adapting a specific storyline, it very much feels like the average campaign, to the point you can basically see where each character nat 20s and where they crit fail. You can see where the DM is like “fuck it” and has them conveniently solve a puzzle, and where they sat back and let the party fuck around. This movie gets D&D, and the entire cast is a blast to watch and they have great chemistry. We need more of these films, dammit!

30. Puss in Boots: The Last Wish

Speaking of movies it was easy to write off before seeing, here’s a sequel to a mediocre Shrek shrek spinoff made years after that franchise went dormant. But the movie is so fresh, funny, and vibrant it’s like that Shrek spirit was never gone. Puss is as fun as he’s always been, and the movie manages to tackle his insecurities and grappling with his own mortality with surprising grace for a family comedy film. It also has three of the most fantastic antagonists in Dreamworks history with the anti-villain Goldilocks, the relentless force of nature that is the Wolf, and the hilarious card-carrying villain Big Jack Horner. Truly, this franchise isn’t ogre yet.

29. Aladdin

For the longest time I called this my favorite Disney movie, and how could I not? Robin Williams and Gilbert Gottfried turn in some of the best and funniest performances of their careers here! The songs are absolutely fantastic! Aladdin is a great male lead and Jasmine is a really fun and compelling princess! It got a live action remake that’s actually decent and watchable! And, well, it’s obviously still pretty damn high up there. I’ve just come to realize there’s a couple Disney films I like a little better than this after all.

28. Seven Samurai

This is basically the birthplace of modern action movies, with tropes typical of the genre put on display for the first time and unbuilt at their conception. There’s a lot of commenatry on class and the nature of samurai, ridiculous feats of badassery, and one of the most poignant bittersweet endings imaginable. There’s a reason so many other films across the years have aped this one’s premise.

27. Terminator 2: Judgment Day

James Cameron’s magnum opus, and an action film that redefines cinematic action. It’s just a damn good film with stunning action, but I think there’s a few things that need to be addressed here. For one, as much as people love hyping up Sarah Connor as some feminist ideal or “one of the good ones” when it comes to female characters, she’s kind of a shitty person for most of the runtime, only regaining her humanity and her right to call herself John’s mother with the help of the T-800. And speaking of him, Schwarzenegger truly shows off his genuinely incredible acting chops, between his comedic attempts to emote and his delivery of the most tearjerking thumbs up in all of cinema. And then, finally, there’s Robert Patrick as the T-1000, easily one of the coolest and most intimidating villains in sci-fi, which is all the more impressive since he is scary and a believable menace when going up against a mountain of a man like Schwarzenegger.

26. Nope

In my opinion Jordan Peele has gone three for three with fantastic films, and this one is not only no exception, it’s my favorite he’s made so far. Such a wacky premise delivered in an impressive way, a truly breathtaking monster design, and two of the most unnerving scenes in recent horror history, Peele manages to cement his place as a modern master of his craft.

[checkitoutmikey]

Little thief

You were just minding your own business when a little thief appeared.

Warning: none, one use of ‘chica’ but that’s just Paul so I think reader could be any gender, blood (just a bit), fluff, fluff, fluff

It was painfully slow week night. You were in a limbo of ‚do not want to do anything‘ and ‚could not be bothered to do anything‘ with a bit of ‚I need to make some friends‘ springled in. You weren’t exactly looking for entertainment. Sure, you were bored but that didn’t mean you should be holed up in your room and watch tv all night. Instead you went to Boardwalk to just sit around and lament you weren’t home watching tv. Brilliant plan right there.

But hey, a myriad of sugary junk food was at your disposal here so that’s surely an improvement. You bought some fried dough with heaps of powdery sugar and syrup on it and a milkshake to top off the diabetes inducing extravaganza. Why did you do it? Again, you were bored. The rides didn’t seem appealing and the shops didn’t have anything new to offer so wasting money on something you would bite into once and leave for some homeless person to find seemed like the right thing to do.

You sat down at one of the vacated picnic tables down at the beach, where the circus music from all those rides seemed to fade into a nice lull. You laid out your outrageous choice of the dinner on in front of you without touching it. Sometimes a person just needs to be in the right headspace to down 15 oz of pure sugar, you know? The briny smell of the ocean filled your lungs. You were watching the waves roll over one another when you heard a little thud.

A bat.

A tiny brown bat landed on the table right in front of you. That little pebble fucker wasn’t even looking at you! It was trying to get into the cup of milkshake that towered over it. It‘s tiny clawed hands scraped over the slick plastic surface. The little body was shakily balanced on two unstable feet that shuffled from place to place as it tried to climb up the cup but failed. Flopping it’s wings here and there to try and get into better position as it planned it’s next attack.

It was digustingly cute.

You had to chuckle at the small noice of frustration that left the little creature after an unsuccessful jump. It just hopped onto the cup before sliding down like some cartoon character. „Hey, bud,“ you said and the bat stopped in it’s tracks. It looked up at you with beady black eyes, head tilting to one side as if to say ‚yeah?‘. It wasn’t afraid at all. Huh, maybe it was used to tourists feeding it?

„Were you seriously trying to steal it right in front of my eyes?“

The animal made small squeaking noise and wiggled it’s butt. You took that as a yes.

„Little thief. Well, at least you confessed.“

You reached over and pulled out the straw, covering it in whipped cream before offering it to your new furry companion. „Here you go.“ It immediately went for it. Tiny pink tongue darted out to scoop up the sugary goodness. It was making proper mess too. It’s mouth and the tip of one of it’s ears somehow got covered in cream. There was no decorum. Just pure gluttony. The thing looked more and more like a piglet rather than a bat as it devoured the treat and almost bit through the straw itself.

„Careful. You don’t want tummy ache,“ you smiled down at it and dutifully kept the straw leveled so the tiny beast could snack comfortably. When there was no more food left, it snapped it’s small fangs at the stick before biting into it and trying to wrench it from your grasp. The key word ‚try‘. It could dig it’s miniscule heels in all it wanted but you were simply stronger, bigger and - most important – you refused to give up your straw. Instead you pulled it away and scooped some more cream before giving it to your ungrateful friend.

Can bats even eat sugar? Now, you didn’t know anything about bats but you hope it’s smell and insticts will inform it if it’s good for him or not.

After it finished it’s serving, it looked up at you, at the cup, back at you before strolling over to the cup at tapping at it few times. Then it had the nerve to look back at you. That little rascal.

You graciously pulled a piece from the fried dough and offered it instead just so your sponger would have some variety. It immedietly went into munch town, wiggling it’s butt and making happy yipping noises. You think you heard it purr at one point when it was licking syrup from your finger but you weren’t sure. The thing was too small and the crashing waves nearby too loud.

Giving it second helping of the dough, you put your face in hand while holding the treat in the other. It took quite a while for it to scarf down the food and you spaced out in the meantime. It was kind of nice. Providing for a cute little animal filled you with dopamine and when it’s tongue started licking your fingers again you just closed your eyes and enjoyed the feeling… before the serene moment ended with a flash of pain.

„Ouch, hey,“ you huffed. Pulling your hand back, you looked at it and saw your finger was bleeding. „Hey,“ you said again, this time in accusing manner and looked at the bat that somehow managed to look sheepish. „That’s not very nice thing to do, you know?“

The bat folded it’s wings underneat it’s body and hung it’s head down. It did look properly scolded so you took pity on it. You sigh before presenting your injured finger, „you see this? You don’t do this to someone who’s nice to you. This place is way too sensitive for your little nibblers.“ You paused for a second to let the information sink in because by this point you were fully convinced this tiny animal could understand you. Or you just went too long without human interaction. „You go for the knuckle, it doesn’t hurt as much there“ you finished.

You put your hand in front of the bat and angled it so the imp had better access. Those beady eyes look up at you in confusion. It’s stare flicked down at your hand before up again. With a smile, you tapped at your knuckle with your other hand, „go ahead bud.“

It took a hesitant step forward before giving your knuckle tiny lick. When you just smiled down at it and nodded it dived right in. It looked like it had to use some strenght to bite through the thick skin but after a few tries it finally managed to get to the blood.

Blood. Huh.

It didn’t even faze you. Guess they are right when they say people of Santa Carla are strange.

You let your tiny guest lap at your hand to it’s heart content. You were honest enough with yourself to admit that when it made those little cooing noises of content, it warmed your heart. The bat got overexcited and stuck it’s snout into the wound, presumably filling it’s nostrils with blood, and started sneezing. „There’s no rush.“ You rubbed it’s back as gently as you could. It shook it’s head in order to clean up it’s airways but after a minute or two it went right back to it’s dinner.

Maybe you could take it home. Having a pet bat is rather rad. It obviously wasn’t afraid of you and you had an inkling it would be an excellent listener. Who needs friends when you have an animal who can’t argue back?

„Now, what do we have here.“

A voice startled you from the peaceful moment and you whipped around to see four punks standing nearby. Familiar faces. You saw them on the Boardwalk where they had a reputation of being trouble makers. The bleached blonde Billy Idol wannabe, Twisted Sister, Tall Dark and Handsome and an actual angel that currently looked like he’s about to chew off his own thumb with a manic smile on his face. The last one was the only person who wasn’t examining you like a bug under a microscope. He was looking down… at your hand?

Before you had chance to do anything, the tall brunette flicked his eyes somewhere behind you and said, „Laddie,“ in tone that bone tired parents used on their misbehaving children. You turned back to see a little boy trying to hide behind you.

„Huh.“ There was a second of silence before you pieced together what was happening. „So you are a little vampire,“ you said to the boy who gave you toothy smile.

„Hey! Hey, chica! How do you know that?“ The rocker guy asked, looking genuinely flabbergasted.

You gave him the arched brow of condescendance. „Dude, this is Santa Carla. Everybody knows it has pest problem.“

[cconfusedkat]

NO GO YAP QUEEN/KING/NOBLE! YAP ABOUT MY FAVORITE BISHOP THAT LOOKS SO SOFT!

HELP- king will do preferably lmao- however im just the Janitorial Guy in the castle that nobody takes notice of too often but is like ❤️ a micro celebrity❤️ a fella walking around and dont know what the HE'LLLLL he is doing.......

Leshy is either soft or like. Digustingly Fuzzy. If that makes sense ???. It just depends on wether or not hes on a mission with his darkwood disciples or just a general mission ,,, Bro gets a bunch of dirt in his fur as well as blood so Allure literally has to hunt leshy down and shove him into a bath- 💀 OHHHH BROTHERRRR THIS GUY STIIINNKSSSSSS

He specifically listens to allure because he just thinks his lecturing little lamb leader is cute (definitely not in a gay way) (uh huh mhmmhm Yeah yep yes yuhhuh,) and hes like Oka❤️😊

oooootherwise as terrifying as he is standing tall with a 10 ft tail he can be so soft to touch !!!!!!! Very soft fur !!!! It takes forever to wash himself probably a couple hours due to how tall he is and how many things he has to get clean ??? Like he cant rely on anyone else too much unless if its Yara (yellow cat) for plucking out any thorns in his skin ouch Ouch

SOFT BUT AT WHAT COST ????? ATTT WHAT COSTTTTTTTTTTTT

That does make me realize he probably needs to brush himself and also have a huge bed for the sake of wrapping his tail on something and the ability to stretch ,, shamura does like to take care of their siblings (whereas kallamar scoffs and goes "TAKE CARE OF IT YOURSELF. DAMN") so they do like to at least brush leshy ,,, unrelated but shamura also likes to help with the others bandages :>cc... just not their own . Scratches head . Heket is probably the only person willing to change shamuras bandages before it makes them insane with the ichor spillage or smth

Allure sometimes sleeps next to leshy but the more times they do theyre late to almost anything they plan out for the cult ,,, usually its them holding onto shamura begging to go back to sleep for another five minutes ,,, But were talking about a 6'5 worm holding onto a 5'5 lamb here ,,, ALLURE IS STRONG OBVI but leshy can outdo hxs strength ,, aw jokes aside i think itd be rlly silly to draw a couple of things i just mentioned out of this-

YAP YAP YAPPPPP IM YAPPING YAP None of that was neccesary but my brain neurons activated for a Single Moment

[flodaya]

they seem the type to kiss i front of their kids which makes lil ones go ewww

yeah we've all had that friend whose parents were still digustingly in love after 20 years of marriage and would have no shame showing pda in front of their kids and all their teen friends and the children would go ewwww but secretly everyone would find it so cute how the parents managed to stay so in love and infatuated for decades

[sparklyeyedhimbo]

secret boyfriend era songkhramai is very digustingly cute

i wanna jump off a building it's so cute [affectionate]

[godlyavenger]

TUMBLR IS LIKE A COCKROACH IN THE SENSE THAT IT'S DIGUSTINGLY CUTE AND WILL NEVER DIE

Puki will you leave tumblr because everyone’s acting like it’s dead now :(

oh yeah its SO dead.

1000 notes this post. Now

[sunmoonyandstars]

ive been feeling so digustingly dysphoric lately I hate it so much I just want to wear something cute but NO I have to look like a rectangle or I feel like crying

[mysteriouseggsbenedict]

names Nicholas and Milligan call each other, starting normal and then getting more unhinged:

love

sweetheart/sweetie

cutie

silly

their names but starting with different letters, like “picholas” and “shmilligan” 

milligan once accidentally ate the orange that nicholas was keeping for himself in the kitchen and for the rest of the time nicholas calls him “orange thief” when he’s in silly moods or pretending to be mad

nicholas calls milligan “flower” sometimes because of milligan liking to be outside and garden

milligan calls nicholas “curlicue” especially while he’s stroking his hair or scratching his scalp

nicholas would think of some absurdly long and formal name that involves like every single honorific possible like “sir lord duke mr. milligan wetherall the third junior”

[terukie]

new mob trait just dropped: gaslights people as a stress response

[castieltrash1]

just read the fluff that brooklyn wrote i can actually feel my heart growing three sizes grinchcore style

[wayvgorl]

honestly wayv are so cute w/ the way they tell each other that they miss/love each other out of nowhere on instagram, but be beefing within 2 centimeters of each other lmao they really are siblings first and foremost

[whaechan]

@draco-mafloy

big cutie energy 💘

[princessmcpurpledork711]

TerraVen, you say? 👀👀👀

Yessss! Terraven is our OTP. Especially Ellie. It is her OTP. Terra and Ventus are almost always friends that have very obvious crushes on each other. Aqua is Terra's sister and exasperatingly waits for these two to admit it XD